HOPE FOR CODEPENDENTS:  HELPING A CODEPENDENT FRIEND

Baca:

"Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls. For My yoke is wholesome (useful, good-not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant), and My burden is light and easy to be borne." Matthew 11:29-30 AMP

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Bacaan tahunan:

Thoughts for the Day

Codependent people often feel guilty because they believe that they did something to cause their loved one to go out of control. They see that their efforts have not cured the person, and they think that somehow if they try harder, they can control the person with the life-controlling problem. The misbelief that we can "fix" other people leads to a painful cycle of failure and loss of self-worth.

If you are trying to assist a friend who has become codependent, help him or her understand these truths:

They did not cause their loved one's problem. Their loved one is responsible for the choices that have led to addiction, no matter what the circumstances may be.

They cannot control their loved one's behaviors. Trying to control the struggling person through manipulation, domination and guilt only leads to a greater loss of energy. They cannot fix their loved one-only God can do that.

They cannot cure their loved one. Encourage them to give their anxiety to the Lord. He doesn't want us to suffer through this kind of struggle. He has promised us that his burden is light.


Consider This . . .

Codependents need encouragement to examine their own lives. Because of their own delusions, they usually cannot see their addiction to another person. It takes friends from the outside to point out this reality to them. You can help your codependent friends by

Taking them to a Living Free Concerned Persons group
Encouraging them to focus on Christ instead of on their loved one
Modeling an honest relationship with respect and boundaries
Care-fronting delusion
Encouraging them to accept responsibility for their own actions
Praying for them

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Living Free Every Day is a ministry of livingfree.org

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